Monday, March 17, 2008

St. Kilda Beach

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Today was my last full day in Melbourne, before heading out to ChristChurch, New Zealand tomorrow night. Of course, it was 100 degrees again, so someone suggested I go to the big beach here in the city. So, thinking it might be a bit cooler down there, I slathered on some sunscreen and hopped onto the train...then the tram to the beach (first stopping to take a pic on the bridge by the main train station, above).

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The trams don't have air-conditioning, so I tried to distract myself from the oppressive heat by reading the series of overhead promos that are geared towards people who just hop on the tram and don't pay the fare (no one actually checks on a regular basis). The signs were pretty funny and, judging by the breath of the person standing next to me, it's quite possible that I was within inches of one of the very culprits that they wished to drop an anvil on. I know I wanted to....

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So, the tram stopped at the St. Kilda beach main hub. I noticed a dry/brown park with a Coney Island-esque roller coaster off to the side. It didn't appear to be running and, frankly, that is the last thing I'd want to do in 100 degree heat...be tossed about at great speeds in the burning sun while the remnants of my scorched flesh rained down upon the locals below. So, I headed for the main restaurant area in search of shade, food and a cold beverage.

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Thankfully there were lots of overhangs. Of course, the place I chose to eat didn't have so much air-conditioning, as it did "warm-hot-breath-with-a-hint-of-less-hotter-breath" whispering above me. But, it was better than sitting ouside, so I ate a pretty good burger and fries and made my way down the street. There were some interesting store names along the way, so of course, I have to share them....

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That is a housewares store....


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On a hot day like this, I'd say Victoria had reason to be...


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I did not eat here....but I do appreciate Joe letting me know ahead of time.


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This "Hair Room" certainly had a festive rooftop...

So, after doing my best to stay under as many shaded areas as possible while walking, I decided that I would head to the beach. So, I walked about 3 blocks in the sun, crossed a busy road and made it to the beach and, I'm not kidding you....it was even hotter there.

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You know that scene in "National Lampoon's: Vacation" where the family arrives at the Grand Canyon...stands there for about 3 seconds, then Chevy Chase says "Okay" and they turn around and leave? That's pretty much what I did here at the beach. I took the picture above....then walked under a palm tree (for shade) and took this picture of the other side...

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Then a group of asian tourists arrived out of nowhere, most of them fully dressed, many in jeans, layers of shirts and even a couple of scarves...it felt even hotter there just looking at them huddled together on the sand as if it was 30 below and they needed to group-hug just to keep warm...

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"Okay!"...I was done with the beach.

I've seen beaches before in my life and this was certainly...one of them. I headed back to the bus/tram stop and waited for the next warm boxcar back to the city. While I was standing there, I noticed a group of loud drunken people in large clover-themed hats yammering away in the bus stop area and it reminded me that today was St. Patricks Day here in Australia.

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So...Top' O' the Mornin', Lucky Charms, Irish Spring and Mekka Lekka HI, mekka Hiney Ho to each and every one of you!

5 comments:

gonoles84 said...

I think I own those platforms the "disco guy" is wearing on the roof of Hair Room. I'll wear them to the Eagle when you get back....or YOU could wear them with your ass-less chaps!

rrt30 said...

Maybe Victoria was caught evading fares and that's why she's bitter. You know, when going to the beach, one usually at least slips their tooties into the cool ocean. I've heard it helps when the outside temperature is on the warm side. Or, were spiders swimming?

Vampire Hours said...

Yes Chris, you must wear those shoes out one night. Actually, you should wear them every day. As far as going into the water, it was that hot that I didn't even want to get out of the shade to trapse across the hot sand to step in it. Plus, someone did tell me yesterday that there is a poisonous spider here that can live underwater for 4 hours and to watch for them at the beach, cause they'll just look like a blade of grass....aaaaahhhh!

jthoskins said...

Ah, the sunburnt splendor of Australia... no wonder they sent all the criminals down there to the harsh conditions and creepy crawlies. It's just like Ceti Alpha Five in Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan... only with all the testosterone, and one fortieth of the over-acting.

Vampire Hours said...

That is hilarious...and pretty true. With my last breath, I spit at thee.....